Expression and Purpose: : Ashi’s Practical Guide to Finding Your Purpose for REAL
Unlocking the power of Expression in the world of Purpose
I was a shyish kind of a guy who at times found it difficult to express my emotions. Neither did I feel the need to express myself as I come from a joint family of 72 members - so, I never looked out and in fact used to complete my homework in recess, so that I can go home and just focus on playing with cousins and flying kites.
Came under-graduation, and my world changed upside down with everything fresh around filled with new people with agendas and I had to choose people, develop friendships.
This led me to explore poetry and eventually started a card service which used to help people express how they feel about a person, situation and occasion. Later I used tech to make it an app and a platform under the brand name as “Poetcard”. In fact the parent’s company name was “Expression Impression Labs”.
Expressions, as I mentioned, form a crucial part of our personality and very few of us are good in expressing and hence they fare better in all aspects of life. When I read
’s HeyEmotions and her recent e-book on “How to say No?” - I found a friend with similar drive with not only solutions but with frameworks to address it and I thought to invite her here.Ashi has done an exemplary work in going like 10,000 ft. in exploring expression, a core aspect of our personality that decides who we are as individuals and how we deliver ourselves to others. In today’s article, she is going to tell us the unknown power of expression - one that can change our life beyond measure.
I will not take more space now and will hand it over to Ashi…
Hey friend,
Let’s get right to it..
We’ve a non-existent relationship with the term “expression”.
I may be generalizing. But stay with me…
When you think of the term “expression”, what comes to your mind?
For most of us it’ll be “facial expressions”.
If we think more, other stuff will come to mind. Such as, “being vocal”, “sharing one’s thoughts and feelings”, “writing”, etc.
Each of our interpretations of the term “expression” depends on our upbringing, beliefs, professions, environments and viewpoints.
For the people working in creative heavy professions like art and theater, it’s easier to relate with “expression”. For the people working in left-brain heavy professions like finance, it’s not that easy to relate with this term.
Hence, when I say we’ve a non-existent relationship with “expression”, I’m making you question your own relationship with it!
Utkarsh has told me that I’m writing to a community of creators, builders, and change-makers. So I’m leading with the notion that you’re one of those rebels who love to question things.
Question yourself:
What's my relationship with the term “expression”?
Please don’t read ahead unless you have some answer to this question.
Deal?
Cool.
Alrighty.
I believe by now you’ve got some idea of how you relate with “expression”.
Don’t worry. I’m not gonna pass or fail you. Haha. There’s no right or wrong answer here. There exists only YOUR answer.
Now whatever your answer is, write it down somewhere. On a paper, on a digital notepad, on a whiteboard…whatever seems suitable to you.
Do it. I’m waiting.
Done?
Come on. Just do it. It’s for your own benefit.
I hope you’ve written it down somewhere by now.
High five! 🙌
Let’s proceed…
There is one common thing that we all keep seeking in our lives.
It’s that thing which we believe will make our life fulfilling and our career flourishing. So we keep looking.
Some of us look everywhere and don’t find it, ultimately halting the search. Some of us do find it, and make it the north star of living our life.
What’s that thing?
It’s…
PURPOSE.
At one point or other in life, you must have searched for your purpose on this earth.
You may have approached this search by keeping your career at its center. Or you may have done it so by putting relationships at its core.
Whatever the approach, each of us has looked for our individual purpose in one way or the other.
But have we ever wondered, what exactly is “purpose”?
So my friend, put on your curiosity hat back. And sit with the question:
What’s my relationship with the term “purpose”?
(I’m not asking, What’s your purpose? Read the question again.
To give you an example, the answer to the above question can be: I get very overwhelmed whenever I think about my purpose. And when I see other people talking about their purpose, I also feel jealousy…)
You know the drill.
Whatever the answer comes, don’t judge it because all we need is YOUR answer. Write it down on the same page where you wrote down the previous answer with regards to “expression”.
I wish I could read your answers. If you’re comfortable, mind sharing the screenshots of what you’ve written in the comments below?
Okay. You are doing a great job by challenging yourself to question things that aren’t easy to question.
I’m proud of you.
KUDOS! 🥳
Let’s continue…
We’ve seem to believe that our purpose is some extraordinary diamond that’s found in the mines of exploration. So we keep mining.
Nothing is “wrong” with that approach. It’s just that this approach doesn’t always lead to results. Because its orientation is outward.
We keep seeking something outside that’s meant to be found inside.
The mines we’re digging in aren’t even picked by us. We followed the crowd which had been doing an outward search. And we ended up following it, knowingly or unknowingly.
Then when we don’t find any diamonds of purpose, we either exhaust ourselves into hopelessness. Or we give ourselves an anchor in the viewpoints like “Purpose is overrated” and we let ourselves out from the mines of exploration.
We look for something at the place where it won’t be found. And when it’s not found there, we conclude that it can never be found.
It doesn’t seem fair to me.
What if we start nudging ourselves to look within?
The mines we need to be digging in to find the diamond of purpose lie inside of us.
Have we looked within?
I invite you to look within yourself to find your purpose, your why, your north star. Be it for your life or your career.
How to look within?
Refer to the answers you wrote a while back.
Your first answer tells you your relationship with the term “expression”. And the second answer tells your relationship with the term “purpose”.
Read both answers. And try to spot a pattern.
Found anything?
Well, the prominent pattern would tell you:
The more uncertain your relationship with “expression” is, the more unclear your relationship with “purpose” will be.
Read it again, if you may.
I’ve met many people who don’t have a clear relationship with expression, but “think” that they’ve a strong relationship with purpose.
When I talk more to these people, one of the following I end up discovering:
They actually have a strong relationship with purpose and expression. Just that they’ve been misunderstanding the notion of expression, which when refined gives them conviction in their relationship with the term “expression”.
Regardless of their relationship with expression, they have made themselves believe they’ve a strong relationship with purpose. So when I pose certain questions to them, they get defensive. The more they get defensive, the clearer it is that they’ve been identifying with the notion of purpose that’s not coming from their inner-self.
Also, there’s a distinct group of people who have a clear understanding of how they relate with expression, yet they feel unconfident when it comes to their relationship with purpose.
Why?
Because they perceive “purpose” the way they think they “should”. And it leaves them astray. Once their blindfold of shoulds and shouldn’ts comes down, they find their purpose sitting right next to them, smiling at them and having a beautiful connection with them.
Take these aforementioned categories as a reference, and reflect on:
Which of these do I find relatable in my case?
This will take you closer to understanding and bettering your relationship with expression, and henceforth purpose.
The bottomline?
Your answers written on that piece of paper are your key to unlocking your relationship with purpose.
You need to begin with your expression to find your purpose.
Expression is all about how you share your feelings, thoughts, beliefs, viewpoints, perspectives, stories, experiences; basically YOURSELF with the world; via your words, behaviors and actions.
There doesn’t go a single moment in your day where you’re not expressing yourself. In many of those moments you’re expressing yourself to yourself; via your self-talk, deep work, journaling, meditation, prayer, etc.
In the other moments you express yourself to others; via the ways you navigate your relationships, converse with others, do random things, help others, etc.
The way you share yourself with the world, is where the hints of your purpose lie.
Hence, look within.
Begin with understanding your expression.
Because nothing tells so much about you like your expression does.
Rely on it.
You’ll be shocked and surprised. But you’ll definitely find your purpose.
If you need my help, I’m here.
Utkarsh, thank you for inviting me to write this article. My writing process leads with the purpose of not just giving perspectives to my readers, but to myself as well. And I know I’ve refined many of my perspectives by writing this article. Thank you so much. I hope this article delivers what I intended it to deliver :)
Cheers,
Ashi
ps: I’ve recently launched my group coaching program “Self-Expression Group Intensive 1.0” to help people befriend their self-expression. The program begins from 13th April. I’m onboarding only 7 people for this month-long program. If you’re fed up with your hesitation of expressing yourself to yourself and/ or to others, do check this program out.
What works for me is:
1. Take a value of yours
2. Select a slice of the world you like
If that slice of the world followed that value better, what would it look like?
Eg: If B2B SaaS(an industry I genuinely love), grew (growth is a core personal value of mine) there would be a lot more amazing people, frameworks and companies supporting them.
It was fun to write this one 🫶